Sunday, September 28, 2008

HAPPY DAUGHTER'S DAY :)

Note: Found this post dated April 20th amongst unpublished drafts.

Date April 20th, 2008, Time 6 pm.

Husband watching TV. With IPL, ICL he's even more glued to the TV, if that was possible. I am glued to my laptop. Kids busy preparing for their bright futures in their rooms...or at least one of them is. The other one enters the room.

Daughter- There's nothing nice to eat at home! Husband can hear nothing except the TV.
I - Have some juice.
Daughter - No, something nice.
I (knowing very well what 'nice' means) - Like what? Shall I cut you an apple?
Daughter - No not fruit or fruit juice. Not something good for health! Something nice.


Husband generally believes I get carried away with my passion for healthful and wholesome; he gives us an absent minded glance.

I say - What you need is a glass of milk and a sandwich.
Husband continues watching TV. Daughter gives me "and you call yourself my mother?" look.
I
- Maybe all this is just an excuse, because you don't want to study. (watching Husband who now peels his eyes off the TV and gives the brat a glance).
Husband - What do you want to eat?
Daughter - (without looking at me) Plum cake. Masala peanuts. And Pepsi.
I
look like I am going to choke - What? You want an upset stomach and pimples? Just before exams? You go do your work; I will get you some chilled watermelon.

Husband, eyes at the TV again, mutters... Are you sure?
Daughter - I don't want something healthy, I want something I like...I am studying!
Husband
(to me) - It's okay during exams...they are working hard, let them have what they want...
I (very firmly, pretending to get up) - I will sprinkle some chat masala on watermelon and you will love it with ...
Daughter
No I don't want such things! I want something nice!!! (Realises this is taking time. Sits down)
I - What's wrong with you? Show me what you were studying, maybe it's becoming too much, I will ask you some questions to help you revise...
Daughter Nooooo I am hungry...
Husband forgets the TV, picks the phone (like I knew he would) and orders Plum cake, Pepsi and Tasty Nuts for instant home delivery from the neighbourhood grocery shop...like I knew he would :)
I pretend to give up in mild disgust...

Happy Daughter's Day :)

50 comments:

Devaki said...

Hahaha! Your kids are lucky to have a cool chilled out mom like you! And looks like you and your husband are perfectly in tune with each other too? :)

Imp's Mom said...

hahhaha...lol... I can so picture this with my daughter, only difference is that she is already up to it now....lol...

btw finally done with the tag :)

Aaarti said...

hahahaha... that sounds like a scene right out of our home..

everytime me and my sis come over to the kitchen[ i do cook, and help out, its those rare days] and look around, then sigh saying" i want something interesting"... gramma/mom knows we want something from outside... :D

we do win at times.... :D

Sue said...

;) Been there, done that. Actually, do that, everyday. I'm sneaky like that.

Aneela Z said...

awww, that's why I love little girls..for all their little nakhras.

Indian Home Maker said...

@Devaki LOL In tune? He is the family's Santa Claus, and I am the school principal in Roald Dahl's 'Matilda' :)

@Imp's Mom, oh yes I was in splits while reading 'In lighter vein'!!! They learn very fast how easily they can twirl us around their little fingers :)

@Aaarti LOL, Now I have given away the other side of the story too ;)

@Sue :)) - I never tire of finding out how he can't see her disappointed :)

@Aneela Z - Me too :)...love them nakhras & tantrums and all :)

indyana said...

Oh gosh! Another page from my life book! hehe! My daughters idea of nice is always but always instant noodles! Tch!

Indian Home Maker said...

@Indyana I went grocery shopping with my daughter after picking her from some class, and she wants to pick everything that is ready to eat or can be cooked in two minutes.

chirax said...

Ha ha ha Brilliant :)

chandni said...

lol!!!

I am glad u're not my mom :)

if u see what I indulge in, when I actually do....u'll flip :D

Sumana said...

See the daughter's know the way to get things done and the dad's maan. All we could do is watch the game. Don't you think??

Monika said...

story of every house I guess :) :)

Indian Home Maker said...

@Chirax :)

@Chandni Hey didn't you see she had what she wanted and I only pretended horror :)

@Sumana LOL Dad is the one to turn to when they want garbage for snacking:)

Indian Home Maker said...

@Monika Lol :)

worldthrumyeyes said...

Hahahaha cute :)

Nimmy said...

:)

I always ask my mom,'whatz in those biscuit tins'...I'ld keep pestering her 'What else,what else' until she name s a favourite item of mine ;-)

Pinku said...

hey.... u mom's are such hitlers.

Come on all is fair at exam time you should know that...and tell me u didnt enjoy the Plum cake and peanuts and pepsi more than you would have that watermelon....eeeeeks!!!

Indian Home Maker said...

@Pinku LOL She got what she wanted :)

phoenixritu said...

Mine check the fridge before they come up with one of these ones. Why does it have to be something that is not there already at home?

Mampi said...

Aww that was cute of him.
Btw I see my daughter doing the same in another couple of years...
The post was a great help.
Happy daughters day to all you girls and girls of girls.

Mama - Mia said...

:)

ooh! i still get cravings for "smothing nice". but now i have to make it myself!

so i resort to maggie with cheese and chilli flakes!! :P

LOVED this post IHM!

cheers!

abha

Indian Home Maker said...

@worldthrumyeyes :)

@Nimmy Aww probably she also enjoyed your pestering :)

@phoenixritu - Yes, I have noticed this too, or else the moment it finishes they want it :)

@Mampi - I enjoy watching how he can never say no to her :)

@Mama-mia - LOL, I love Maggi it's great for a sore throat too.

my space said...

Lol! My daughter will open the refrigerator for 5 mins then each cupboard for 2 minits or so each and declare that "There is NOTHING to eat here!Iwant to eat SOMETHING!" What that something finally turns out to be is...Maggi, chocolates ,wafers or some junk...

Anrosh said...

sugar rush .. is all what kids want..and sometimes us too. don't we all take umpteen cups of caffeine and press the button at the vending machine for the 3'o clock and just before lunch 11'o clock sugar rush?

Mavin said...

Hahahahaha...........typical scene in every home I guess.

I made my daughters read this post and they freaked out. The younger one felt instant connection with your daughter..tell her she is not alone..

Still cannot stop laughing:-)

Will remember the next time we hear this bored drawl "What's there to eat - something interesting?"

A rebel all the way... said...

hahahahaha......i love namkeen and junk food....mom is not here so I have as much as I want...
i know its unhealthy n all..but cant control my tastebuds...:(((

Vikram said...

Why anyone would like cake and Pepsi over watermelon is beyond me ? Watermelons are the best. ;)

I am going to have some baked fish tikka and chilled watermelon tonight myself. :)

Indian Home Maker said...

@myspace Oh yes, I can picture that :) I hope you do let her have that SOMETHING?!

@anrosh LOL, Yes, and of course they have to have 'something nice' like tasty Nuts and cake!

@Mavin Thanks :) My daughter read this and is delighted, she says if I blogged about her listening to music while studying I will find all teenagers do that too.

@a rebel all the way - My kids will totally agree with you :)

@Vikram LOL This preference for bad tasting, oily 'outside' food is totally beyond me too:)

Monika,Ansh said...

lol....I am just like her. "Nice" means chips/ kurkures and the like.

amitsarkar said...

Apparently, a global phenomenon! :-)

churningthewordmill.wordpress.com said...

i am with ur daughter on this one.. i am constantly telling my mom to cook something "nice" & when she asks me to describe "nice" i havent a clue..yet i keep telling her" make nice dinner,ok?"...she doesnt say it but i think it irritates her a lot!:P
mandira

Indian Home Maker said...

@Monika,Ansh hehehe if she reads this ever...:))

@AmitSarkar LOL so Stwabbit does the same!?

@mandira I assure you your mom misses all this when you go to Gujrat and Delhi :)

D said...

Awww... Know the feeling albeit from the other side.

1conoclast said...

:-)))

Indian Home Maker said...

@d & 1conoclast :)

Anonymous said...

What I am writing about now has got nothing to do with your post but I somehow felt that as a girl, I wanted to ask this in a place like this where so many people come together and disucs so many things. My problem might not sound like a 'big' thing to many people, but before someone considers it small, I ask you to think from my angle just once and then say anything. I cannot post this on my own blog because all those people who 'know' me might not feel that great to see it there.. I know how I've resisted my urge to post this in there and get the people to concerned read this.

So, here it goes.. In our so called loving family, we are the only 2 girl children, me and my cousin. I am elder to her by a year and a half. My aunty who is younger to my mother has always been jealous of my mother and perhaps that is what she's always taught her daughter too coz everytime they speak, they say something to hurt me or my mom because we are in a better position than them (financially) and earlier I never even realised that they were actually envious of us. I was never brought up in an environment where my parents discussed their financial position in front of us and my dad's earnings remain a mystery to me even today. And when I moved in to stay with them for a year during my studies, I got exposed to discussions about earnings and assets.

anyway, my marriage got fixed and due to some unavoidable reasons, it got postponed by a year. in the meantime, my cousin finished her studies and got a job.. btw.. i got a better job too! so.. this aunty of mine decided to get her daughter married ASAP and said its because of some horosceop.. well there was no problem in the horoscope until earlier this year.. the moment it was decided that my wedding is to be delayed by a year, my cousin's horoscope started having troubles. They found a match for her just like mine. Well not exactly there too.. in a hurry perhaps they r getting her married to an idiot. He hasn't even seen his wife to be face to face. He has just seen a pic of hers and because his father said the girl is good, he agreed to get married to this female. The father of the groom is a dictator. He told them that they have to live in a joint family come what may. Right now the guy's in the States, but he plans to move back to India in a few years. So the bottomline is they decided to get the girl married before me in any circumstances. Also, she's been strictly told that she is not supposed to work whatever happens.

My problem is, mine was supposed to be the first wedding in the family after a long time, but then all of a sudden they got my cousin's wedding in between and so people are more involved in her wedding. i feel that now, my wedding has become a "ohh.. my God! another function!" kinds for my relatives as happens if you have too many functions to attend in a span of 2-3 months.

I don't understand if its right to be disheartened and disappointed that things turned out this way. I have absolutely no clue if my feelings are right. Just that its always been a comparison from my aunty's side. She wants to do things before my mom does them. So perhaps this is yet another such instance. And I am disappointed that even my uncle wanted to do things like this before my dad. In many families, I've known even in cousins, the younger ones are gotten married after the elder ones in the family. May be its the ego in me thats upsetting me so much.

All this is not letting me be happy and excited about my marriage. Is this right? Am I expecting too much?

Anonymous said...

I've thought so much about it now that I don't even know what I've typed in and what I've pressed here. This is the nth time I've cried about this. Frankly I am fed up of this and want an end to all this. :(

Indian Home Maker said...

@Anonymous I have just got back home, found your comment here. I will read your comment and reply soon. But let me tell you if this is upsetting you enough to write about it, it can't be so trivial. Do you think you might prefer to send me an email at indianhomemaker@gmail.com ? I don't mind replying here, just thought I'd tell you, you could do that also.
Sibling rivalry can be painful and hurtful, and in India, girls are brought up to believe that getting married is a huge achievement. A wedding is just a ceremony, what's really important is the person you are marrying. If you like the guy you are marrying then believe me all this just does not matter. Don't worry about postponement and delays, one or two months or even years here and there might seem like a lot right now, but in the long run the only thing that will matter is how happy you are in your marriage.
And people will find something to talk about, remember, 'You can buy flattery, but jealousy has to be earned'.
Your happiness should be in your own hands, how much anybody enjoys the ceremony is less important than how much you enjoy your life and your future.
The younger one getting married can make people talk and yes it might hurt you, but just think does it really matter, don't show it's bothering you at all, enjoy everything, prepare for your own wedding too.
I know at least three girls who got married after their younger sisters, they are all three very happy, people have forgotten who got married when, they just see how happy they are now.
But the biggest power you have is the power of control over your own ego, do you really think it matters what anybody thinks, whether they enjoy your ceremony any lesser, who cares? I am sure those who really like you and truly care for you, will love to attend your wedding even if there is a wedding every month. Those who just come for a ceremony don't care who is getting married, what do you care how they feel?
Now will read your comment properly...just wanted to reply immidiately.

Anonymous said...

Thanks IHM... :) will wait for more updates from you...

Anonymous said...

IHM: Thanks a lot for your reply. Yes I really love the person I am getting married to and I am equaally thrilled about the family too! They are simply awesome. And to be frank, I am going to their family sans any expectations from anyone. I don't want to expect anything because in future, God Forbid if anything ever goes wrong, I don't want to feel bad at that point in time. But here, since its my family and I've always expected and given so much to them, I felt really hurt that they decided to do things like this to me. People have always told me that all the while, they've been setting comparisons between both of us and have always tried to spoil things for me. But, I completely ignored all that out of pure love and affection for my cousin. I always wanted a sister for myself and I considered her more than anything else. I feel betrayed and used by my own family. Which is why, I am now scared of maintaining a relationship. Maybe because of all this, I am spoiling my relationship with my fiance! I don't want that to happen, but its happening and I don't feel good about all this. Now, people are expecting me to be nicey nicey and attend their functions and stuff but is it that important to try to please people who've betrayed me? Is it that important to spoil my mood and mind by going there. I know I have to go for my uncle's sake but should I really try to please my cousin when she does nothing but ignore me?

Indian Home Maker said...

Comparisons always hurt, I think sibling comparisons are the easiest way to kill any love between them. But I would say,act with dignity, do nothing to create any more ill will, be polite and if you really feel hurt, get busy with your own preparation and spend more time chatting/talking/writing to your fiance. This is a beautiful time in your life, you should be able to look back with a smile. Nobody can make you unhappy unless you let them. Let those who compare and create competition do that, you should focus on planning for your wedding.
I hope you are on a prettyfying diet? Lots of papaya, carrot juice, fruit and fruit packs/scrubs on face and body, frequent oil massages (or oil baths, in the South, apply oil and leave it on for a few hours)and my absolute favorite is a scrub made from channa atta (not besan, besan is too fine, this channa atta is courser) mix with sour curd, use it everyday till the day of your wedding. See the magic and thank me :)
Everything looks good on a healthy, glowing skin.

Reflections said...

This post was gr8.........simply laughed & laughed.
I cd imagine the expression on each of ur faces:-D

Indian Home Maker said...

Reflections Thanks :)

Imp's Mom said...

annon and IHM if I can but in...

I grew up in a joint family,where comparisons were/are the norm. same story as yours only jealous SIL, and her jealous daughter...only i do not see it as jealousy. I see it as an inferiority complex... of not being self confident and content with their lives. Everything of mine was copied. Every hair cut I had, every style of dress I wore. and it was done till a few years back. She is younger to me, got married before me, and the copying stopped only when she got married. and same as u again my wedding was a few months after hers. It was so evident my friends could make out. I just did not let it bother me, they are just a tiny speck of my life, a speck that does not deserve much attention, only some social niceties..

It is always the attitude that matters. do not let it bother you, enjoy your time before your wedding, look good and if you are not at all ruffled you would have defeated them at their petty games.

Good Luck girl and as IHM says get that glowing skin, the home made pack works, I did it. Add a dash of honey, turmeric and malai couldn't hurt either :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks a lot IHM and Imp's Mom! It was sure a morale booster! Yes.. I spend most of my time talking/chatting to my fiance! We are busy planning out our life together.. :) Am still working until the end of this month. Will have around a month and a half to take good care of myself after that. Best thing, I work for a super duper company and they feed me tooooo well for words. So food is no problem at all. Yup will definitely do the chana daal thing during weekends.. Thanks a lot again!

Me! said...

ha ha ha...i love this post. you're a smart mom. it's funny is'nt it how things changes when women make the change from a daughter to a mom. few years ago i was always on junk food and always wanted to eat something 'nice' and i still do now too. But I am slowly being more conscious about healthy food too. I'm not a mom (yet) but i see myself moving in that direction :)

-a passer by. will be back

Anonymous said...

IHM- a quick question.. did u say chana daal or atta!? i wonder if besan and channa atta are not the same!?

now a quick note - i am feeling a small tad better now.. it might take some time but i still feel ok.. :) Thanks a tonne..

Indian Home Maker said...

Anonymous: Chana atta is course, besan is too fine. Atta is much better, and sour curds bleach and clean your skin.
You'll be fine, these things can be very bugging, but anybody who was sensible enough to decide to discuss and take action is a smart girl :)
Feel free to mail/comment whenever you feel like :)
Hugs, IHM

Anonymous said...

Thanks IHM!

Usha Pisharody said...

:) Loved this post too!!!

You are one cool mom!!! And the kids are awesomely lucky to have you :)