Friday, October 24, 2008

Threats and Revenge

I call my Sister in Texas.
"The person you are calling does not take unidentified calls. Your Caller ID was not received. To enter an access code, press 1. Or, to record your name so that we may announce your call, press 2."
That's the welcome message on her phone. I always find this kind of irritating, this time I get back at her by reminding her of her favourite feminist, I press 2 and announce,
IHM Sarah Palin calling.
Sister picks the phone instantly, almost hyperventilating.
Sister Please don't take her name! I never objected when you claimed to be Lalita Pawar or Ekta Kapoor, but not Sarah Palin.
IHM (With sadistic pleasure.) She looks like you, spends a lot on her clothes too.
Sister I am so sick of hearing 'pro life' ... I tell them I do not agree with you but I am not going to discuss this.
IHM (Showing sisterly sympathy) You won't hear of Sarah Palin for much longer anyway...
Sister IHM Texas is a dumb republican state... but let's not discuss this, so did you buy that bag?
IHM Yeah, fine, but watch this video called, 'Ballad of Sarah Palin' let me sing it for you...
Sister (Shrieks) No, thank you. Let's talk about something else.
IHM (Speaking fast) She said a thirteen year old rape victim must give birth to her rapist's child.
Sister If you don't stop I will start telling you how BJP and Sangh Parivar are saving the Indian culture ...

Wasn't that hitting below the belt?

49 comments:

Prithi Shetty said...

I never understand how they can be pro-Life as well as pro-WAR ! So its not ok to kill unborn, but its ok to send full grown adults to die. In both cases some hypothetical ideology is placed, but there is precious non-criminal lives involved.

Chirag said...

hey IHM, brilliant Texas hmm...can you believe world's best DSP company is from Texas, bums me out how can so smart people be so blind to the obvious. Look at the brighter side thugh Palin is elected in we'll have a LOT of comedy material :). And yes, that was below the belt :D

Indian Home Maker said...

@prithi Yes, I am totally not able to understand this point of view. And if you watch the whole video, you will hear her talk against Science and Sex education, she thinks people choose to be gay ...she seems so ignorant, also hear which newspapers she reads. She is America's answer to our dear BJP :(

Indian Home Maker said...

@Chirag Oh yes she will keep us entertained :)I hope against all hopes, that Barack Obama wins.

Nita said...

The only think I know about Palin is that she is some old guy's running mate, a guy who is unlikely to become President. I think the Press must be really hyping up this Palin person! I do not think she deserves so much attention.

Mampi said...

Hahha, Loved it. Yes it was hitting below the belt, but I also hate that message that I get to hear when I call friends and family abroad. I actually feel like an outcast. LOL
but You really give me great ideas. Thanks.

Ritu said...

Hhahahaha, well served. I dont think there is much difference between Palin and our desi Sangh Pariwar BTW

Monika,Ansh said...

Lol......miss having a sister to do that with!! & don't tell me that u share each shopping deatil with her over phone in Texas. Kudos to u for bearing those telephone bills!!
I gotta go & see that Palin video now.

Does it matter said...

Nice.

But you say: "I hope against all hopes, that Barack Obama wins."

Meaning, you don't trust the opinion poll leads he has, or you fear some last minute revival for the Reps., or .. ?

Indian Home Maker said...

@Nita I too hope "a guy who is unlikely to become President." loses :)

@Mampi LOL And then blog about what happened when you claimed to be err Ms Hillary Clinton ...? And same for answering machines. Hate using them!

@Ritu They both are right wing and have the same initials, S.P. :)))

@monika,ansh No, not all on phone! Some on Face Book, some while chatting and via email :)) The Palin video is hilarious.

@does it matter No, you know, when we want something very badly, it is better not to get too excited ...like they say, 'There's many a slip between the cup and the lip'. But I hope :)

Aneela Z said...

Oh one has to say 'hope against all hopes' as Americans like voting for the 'dumber one'..they refuse to have anyone in the White House with a higher IQ than them.

Indian Home Maker said...

@Aneela Z LOL I remember the year Bush won against Gore ....yes they can compete with us in voting for the wrong guys :)

Manish Raj said...

She could have started talking about many other events that take place here..and all those would have hit us below the belt..

Janne do yaar..not a bad idea to lose some battles...

Indian Home Maker said...

@manish Raj Oh yes! And yesterday's news about the Hindu Jagruti activists being behind Malegaon blasts. Wonder what's going to become of this country!

1conoclast said...

You Sis REALLY got back at you!!!

And to all the commenters on this post, each of the comments is priceless! Crackling with humour and shining with keen intellect.
This may become my favourite forum!!! :-)

Indian Home Maker said...

1conoclast :)

~Hemanth~ said...

@prithi shetty, IHM: http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=3Djohakx_FE
George Carlin, shares some of your opinions :)

And IHM, I do not really think that was hitting below the belt...It was a shot between the rounds :)

~Hemanth~ said...

oops, wrong link! Here is the correct one.
Prolife is anti-woman: http://in.youtube.com/watch?v=MrXvDXVhqfU

Shail said...

ROFL. That sisterly talk was so much fun. Lalita Pawar and Ekta Kapoor and now Sarah Palin!? You got a unique way of getting your sister's attention! And she threatens to tell you of BJP and Sangh Parivar's way of saving our culture!! Haha!! Below the belt alright!! ;-)
Now let me go and watch the video.

nimis540 said...

:)

I stopped reading about Sarah Palin bcoz to me she seems an over hyped character...Not commenting about BJP and Sangh Parivar..But i am enjoying and having a nice time reading comments by readers in newspapers telling that case against hindu in bomb blast is a conspiracy by congress government..lol..Not to mention media not giving due importance to this..Cough cough..India mein sab chalta hai...

my space said...

lol! sisters are fun..

Usha Pisharody said...

Watched the video .. with characters like that, television does not need sit coms at all.. it's there, in the face ... a huge laughter riot! The irony, and the danger is that they actually belieive this person is capable of being a Deputy to the Prez.. of the darned U S of A!! Oh my oh my!!!

The sisterly affection was tangible :D!! Enjoyed it hugely, especially the final blow :)Definitely below the belt I'd say!

Just call me 'A' said...

ha ha ha, you have a fun sis and i could almost picture her expression.
Sarah palin is over hyped in my opinion. she does not come across as a competent person for the white house at least. she may be ok for Alaska but not Washington. and yes i too hope against all odds that Obama wins. besides being a repulican vs democrat battle this is also emerging in pockets or behind doors as a white vs black battle.

and there we all go again. a phone comversation triggering so many sentiments :)

A

Imp's Mom said...

priceless! Ur sis sure knows how to win rounds :P ***ducking for cover :P

Charakan said...

Hilarious post.Did the conversation really happen as you described?Or did you use some imagination?

Obama will win not because of Sarah Palin but because of the US recession. Had the economy slump came few months late Sarah would have been US VP.

cluelessness said...

I am for pro-life as long as the government can promise to protect the fetus OUTSIDE the mother's body.

While physical health of the mother is given some prominence, they don't seem to care about her mental health at all!

@lankr1ta said...

I love the exchange, your sister is smart...

Mystic Margarita said...

Your sis deserves a hug!
What can you say about Palin - well she can't name a book or magazine she's read recently, thinks she's well versed in foreign affiars coz alaska is close to Russia, loves to shoot moose, is a gun advocate, was a beauty pagent winner, and of course is 'pro life' - the perfect example of an emantipated woman according to certain amreekans. Shessh...makes me sick!

Monika said...

lol!!! only sisters can have such conversations and reg Palin less said the better

indyana said...

Nice to see the relationship with your sis!:) makes me wish I had one too!:)

manju said...

Reading about what Sarah Palin says is always entertaining. I hate to think what would happen if she were ever to become President!

Sujoy Bhattacharjee said...

They keep a tab on all calls coming from countries in South Asia and the Middle East.

And with you mentioning the veep candidate during the call, there is every chance of the FBI making a friendly call.

Yes, they are paranoid out there

Priyanka said...

LOL! Its like "Tu Sher toh main Babbar Sher". Your sis is too good :)
I missed having a sis before but now I have my SIL.

churningthewordmill said...

kinda hitting below the belt...but its not a serious case...so its ok!:)

i know little about palin...havent really been following her on the news..read the obnoxious amount her party was spending on her party was spending to dress her up in the papers some days back..i thot it was ridiculous.. i mean we cud clothe a small nation in that kinda money!!
mandira

odzer said...

Oh I often get messages like that when I call the United States. Actually I wish we could get something like that. I am sick and tired of people calling me up for insurance, credit cards and god knows what else. I guess they still have to pay for incoming calls on their mobile phones in the states or has it changed? I especially hate when you get such calls on roaming, especially international roaming, ouch that hurts! That may be another reason why that feature is useful. Nice and a funny post. I agree with your sister though pro life people! They can be annoying and most of them are for DEATH PENALTY!

Vikram said...

IHM, some of the propoganda and emotional campaigning of the Republican Party could put the most hardened politicians in India to shame.

Btw, I liked your comment on my last post, and I have replied. Let me know what you think.

Indian Home Maker said...

@Hemanth The video was hilarious, he says a lot while making us laugh. Thanks for sharing :)

@Shail Thanks for your much needed support and sympathy :)I am sure you found the video entertaining!!

@Nimmy Yes Nimmy we Indians have double standards...the video would have made you see extremism is a threat all over the world. People can go crazy in the name of religion. Watch it, it's an eye opener.

@my space :)

@Usha Pisharody Yes, it is so absurd it is funny, but there must be people who take her seriously...how can they? Maybe they will change their minds if they hear her speak.

Indian Home Maker said...

@just call me 'a' Yes it is. True...agree. I spoke to someone yesterday who is undecided about who they will vote for, saying he was in Pakistan for some years and how they do not know everything about him, just like they didn't in Bush's case; that he was sure to raise taxes; that all Blacks even those who've never voted before, will blindly vote for him...
My sister & family are all for Obama...so I forgive her her below the belt hit :))

Indian Home Maker said...

@Imp's Mom ROTFL :))) Yeah yeah, with friends like these...

@Charakan Yes, I agree with you, though people also fear a rise in taxes.
The conversation had to be censored a little because my sister has a fondness for profanity in speech :)

@Clueless Absolutely! Succinctly put.

@@lankrita Thank you :))

@Mystic Margarita She makes me sick too :(
Now you made me want to call my sister :)

@Monika I agree with you, on both the points :)

@Indyana Yes I realise. I turn to her for all important advise and just to rant...sisters are a blessing. (i.e. me too)

@Manju The thought sends shivers down my spine.... :))

@Sujoy Bhattacharjee Her welcome message will frighten ten FBIs away I assure you :)

@Priyanka Yeah it's a lot of fun when your best friend is from the same family :)

@Mandira Same here, only know what is there in the news on and off... This video sums up her attitude completely...had me angry and laughing at the same time!

Indian Home Maker said...

@Odzer Yes she says the same things...this is her land line number. There is no such 'welcoming' on the cell phone number:)
Paying for incoming is something I would hate too.

@Vikram I replied to your reply...
And such propaganda anywhere is not the right method err..or IS the 'Right' method of campaigning everywhere :)

karmickids said...

Absolutely below the belt that one...sheesh. Really low.

the mad momma said...

When its a sibling its always below the belt. but oh so right!!!! can we listen in on more conversations with her?

Mama - Mia said...

with Obama racing towards victory, i still dont have lot of confidence in american junta!

but then we elected Modi back!! so who are we to say anything really?!

loved redaing this tongue in cheek serious post IHM! :D

cheers!

abha

roop said...

im in tx too. where is she?

hammy said...

I just read the creationism in class article you pointed out. Damn. I really hope that doesn't work out. Palin should just go bury herself and save some people the trouble.

Indian Home Maker said...

@karmickids :) That made me laugh :))

@the mad momma LOL Yes! :))

Indian Home Maker said...

@Abha I am glad you saw the post for what it is :) These issues are serious and yes, elections can spring unpleasant surprises.

Sue said...

LOL!

Blood etc. showing?

N said...

lol...And I guess the best part during this election was waiting for Tina Fey to do a spoof on sarah Palin :)