I also don't want to be a Feminist.

I don't want to be a Feminist.

55 WORDS FICTION

I don’t care about being equal to men …me wants to live my life peacefully… doing my own thing.

You're working?

Love my job.

Have kids?

Planned later.

Can you make chappaties?

We’ve always had a maid for that!

What will you do if your husband was violent?

You think I’d marry someone that kind?!!!

A literary work will be considered 55 Fiction if it has:

Fifty-five words or less (A non-negotiable rule)

A setting, One or more characters, Some conflict, and A resolution.

(Not limited to moral of the story)

All's well that ends well.

55 WORDS FICTION

How The Green Eyed Monster Died

My black eyes avoided Devi’s tearful brown ones.
Why are women so jealous? I wasn’t divorcing her dammit!
My friend, the wimp, passed her his handkerchief. He was a comfort, dropping in everyday. ..

I was right.

Women need babies to keep them occupied. All her tears disappeared when she saw our blue eyed twins.

Betrayal of the B.

My black eyes avoided Sally’s brown ones.

I looked straight ahead and drove. She snuggled closer. This wasn’t going to be easy.

We were on a lonely highway now. I stopped, opened the door, pushed her out and before I could change my mind, drove away.

I could see her running after the car.

Barking.

When Harriet Met Sally

My black eyes had been avoiding Harriet’s tearful brown ones. I didn’t want to drive with blurry eyes. We missed her mom.

Then we saw her running on the highway. Was she mad!? Harriet screamed. I hadn’t hit her, but we stopped.

The vet gave her tranquilizers. She’ll be fine.

Harriet already is.

A literary work will be considered 55 Fiction if it has:

Fifty-five words or less (A non-negotiable rule)

A setting, One or more characters, Some conflict, and A resolution.

(Not limited to moral of the story)

Said Noodle Strap to the Sari - I

55 WORDS FICTION

Flashing Traffic Lights

Sari clad Susheela glared at the girl in the next car. Music blared though the traffic. Long nails tapped brazenly on the steering wheel. Couldn’t she cover her tattooed shoulder? Then they blame the men....

The light turns green.

A knock at her car window. Startled, she turned to him. And turned away, red faced.

A literary work will be considered 55 Fiction if it has:

Fifty-five words or less (A non-negotiable rule)

A setting, One or more characters, Some conflict, and A resolution.

(Not limited to moral of the story)

Edited to Add:

Urban Dictionary ( http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=flasher ) describes FLASHER as,

Flasher:

1. A person, usually a man, who takes pleasure in exhibiting his private parts to random people in public. A cliché flasher wears a dust-coat, flabs of which he spreads in front of his victim(s).

2. A person who interupts tennis/soccer or any other kind of match by running onto it naked.

Flashers do it usually without a particular reason, for the sake of doing this.

Ad.1 While I was going to meet you I came across a flasher, lurking in shrubs. He had nothing to be proud of!

Ad.2 Kournikova was to serve when a flasher burst in and ran with his fingers V-shaped.

The Earth Hour in 55 Words

Inspired by Solilo, Usha Pisharody, Tearsndreams, Smitha, Ajit and Dhiren my attempt at 55 words fiction :)

The Earth Hour

We would have forgotten if a friend hadn't called to remind!

But we sat in a balcony lit by many neighbours’ lights. Son brought out his guitar and we sang tunelessly. We SMSed all our friends, and took pictures.

Then a friend messaged back, ” You are not supposed to use cell phones cheater!”

Some comments must be responded to.

Modi described shifting of the IPL out of India as a "national shame", P Chidambram said most Indins thought that the Gujarat communal riots were a national shame.

It was good to hear cousin Priyanka Gandhi suggest "Varun read Gita properly". And cousin Rahul Gandhi say, 'Hate and anger blind you.'

BJP supporters had been saying that Congress Dynasty politics will make Rahul Gandhi our next Prime Minister. Sonia Gandhi said Mr Man Mohan Singh was their PM candidate. Now how do we react to 'Advani out, Varun Gandhi is the new star on BJP's horizon' ?

It was good to see some comments answered. I think one more comment must be responded to ...

Anonymous Commenter: Happy to see you taking a keen interest on this ( doctored speech). I would be happier if you can do a post on realities of Pilibhit ... its far removed from our metro's and its something totally different than what our English media is trying to make us believe.

IHM: Only the right wing supporting Indians, (even when they live in the city and speak English) can understand the realities of Pilibhit?
And the fake-Indians who apply lipsticks and light candles believe whatever English Media is 'trying to make us believe'?

Don't you think such divisive tactics are too British (Western!) for a today's Indians to try?

Anonymous Commenter: But then Varun said something very very good (even baddies say some good things at times) .. that he is a hindu and not apologetic about it ..
IHM: And how does one become 'apologetic about being Hindu'?
By respecting the Constitution?
By being non violent?
By not desiring that all non-Hindu Indians are made to be apologetic about being non-Hindus?
Don't you see where such politics is taking us?

Cruelty to animals is a proof of our love for humans?

Cruelty to animals is not a proof of our love for humanity. On the contrary people who are cruel to animals are likely to be cruel to humans also. Our assumption of superiority over all nature and all other creatures is the reason why we have to buy drinking water today. Might is right begins with animals and ends with holocausts.

I always remember this friend who called late one evening, many years ago, she was complaining about the disturbance caused by the noise made by pigeons. Maybe we will soon have no reasons to complain. Sparrows are said to be disappearing from cities. Other birds will follow?

Since we don't believe in keeping birds (or animals) in cages, and since we wanted this round eyed cheeper to practice flying and fly away, we let her out of the cage, shut all windows and switched off all fans.
She was cheeping aloud, eating a little then dozing off.



Then we noticed a sparrow crashing into the window panes, and this baby bird also flew to the pane, it was obvious that this very worried male sparrow on the other side was our baby sparrow's dad. We slowly slid open the window, and the way they met was worth seeing.



This was like a miracle. And then mother bird also came, she did not feed her, she just hung around. I was too overwhelmed and relieved and amazed to pick the camera. I wish I had taken some more pictures. The baby bird inside the cage, feeding off our hands, and the way they first greeted each other were precious!

These pictures were taken much later. We thought it would be easier for the parents if they did not need to go looking for food leaving us worrying about the baby outside the window. So we placed food and water for them. They feasted and fed the baby. And many pictures are blurred because there was too much sunlight outside and I was afraid of frightening them away. (all excuses for bad photography)

It is amazing how they did not reject the baby. It's possible that sparrows don't reject their babies touched by human hands. Or maybe the baby is too old to be rejected.

I have assumed they were the parents, because of the way they greeted each other, and the ease with which they showed him how to fly away to a tree outside. (But I have seen, twice, male cats adopting and taking care of kittens in Kerala, so maybe birds do the same thing?)

The parents visited us for breakfast today morning also, and carried beakfuls of boiled rice for our little Tweeter :)

Like Solilo said this amazing experience did remind me of Mahadevi Verma's amazing stories.

My Sentiments Are Hurt

I have always admired Maneka Gandhi. She is one of the most honest leaders we have and she is not as popular as she deserves to be. I have read she can be rude, but I can understand. Many animals lovers find it very difficult to understand how those who don't care for animals are not able to understand how they feel.

It's like my cat has dozed off while cleaning my hand, with a bit of his tongue still hanging out.

(Nikon D60 is not very polite, it woke him up)

My mom calls, I pick the cell phone and try to pull my hand from under his face, and he immediately presses a soft claw to hold the hand tighter, and snuggles, still more softly into my palm. Eyes squeezing, shutting even tighter. My mom thinks having animals at home ties you down, but I irritate her by telling her what the cat just did.
She is horrified, "Babies do that... your brother was like that as a baby! Why have you got this cat so used to you, what will he do if he is ever separated from you?"

He will die of fear, anxiety, hunger and predators. It's like leaving a city child in a jungle.

Now if a neighbour was to tell me they think cats are cunning, cruel, selfish or bring bad luck, I will try and show them why I disagree, because there was a time I thought the same.

We were coming home after a party one wet, cold (eerie) night, a long drive on an empty road, huge moaning trees, wild rains and then we notice something small moving in the middle of the road. A frog? A snail? There was no way to make sure it doesn't get crushed, so we had to stop to push it aside. In the headlights, I saw a little kitten, soaked and shivering ... looked around for a mother, there was none, so we picked it up and brought it home 'for the night'.

I soon learnt why those who loved cats (Usha Pisharody, Reema, Aneela and Alankrita who claims hers is the handsomest cat in the world :D) just loved them. Maybe it's the way they wake up, looking sleepy, like babies? And then where do you leave them, knowing they can't really take care of themselves?

But I have no idea how to feed or care for a baby sparrow.


Found this one also in the middle of a dark road yesterday, but now she is here, cheeping aloud for food.

Is it true that now that we have 'touched' it, it's parents will reject her? What does one do? We are hoping she will learn to fly better, and fly away. We have a cat at home and this extra responsibility is just not welcome. But this bird looks as much like a baby as a kitten does. Anybody seen a puppy learning to walk? This chick who can fly a little, was slipping on the kitchen counter, feet splaying like a puppy's.

If we leave it, it will not be able to take care of itself. I know crows will eat it alive within hours.

In a similar situation in the past I had emailed to Maneka Gandhi. I was a total stranger, but she was very helpful. I have heard of others who have spoken to her and she has helped them. Now which other political leader can we think of who would have done this? Replied to email or picked her phone to respond to an aam janta?

So just think, here's a fan, who likes her even though she belongs to a party openly supporting a candidate who has allegedly made a shocking, unconstitutional hate speech. And that candidate is her son. It troubles me, I feel betrayed.
My sentiments are hurt.

NOTE Something unbelievable happened to the bird next day, guess what? A special award for the correct guess!!! I had never dreamt that possible, now she is best possible hands... guess whose???

Edited to add: Find the answer here :)

Equal Rights and Opportunities for all?

(Deleted the first part)
Just some questions to help me write a post on this....

1. Do you think Equal Property Rights can empower women?

Answer - Yes? No, Not required, women can be better empowered with education?

2. Is it not against our culture for a sister to demand or accept a share from her brother's rightful inheritance (even though the law allows her a share in her grand parents' property - a daughter can be disinherited by her parents from their self acquired property, through a Will. It is also common to get girls to sign their share away.)

Answer Yes, because they have streedhan and dowry? And they also get a share of their husband's property.

3. She tied a rakhi on his wrist and he will be there if she needs him. Does she really need a legal right to a roof over her head? (Domestic Violence Act has made ' a roof over her head' compulsory, for married and unmarried women). And then she has her husband and sons also.

Yes? No?

4. Chaudhary Charan Singh (... not sure, I think it was him only) was concerned that if sisters are given equal property right,than they will quarrel for property with their brothers. He felt it was unnecessary to create a rift between siblings for a few acres of land. He obviously only valued the closeness of the Ambani brothers, Bachchan brothers, and now the Gandhi brothers.

Answer: So is it better that brothers share property rights, and daughters get a part of their husband's property?

5. Should they be expected to care for their parents if they take their share in property.

What do you think?

Edited to add: I feel, Empowerment through equal property rights is more about ATTITUDE less about the size of inheritance. It is good for any child’s self esteem to know that if her parents’ had one rupee then she and her brother will get fifty paise each. Even a brother will find it easier to respect a sister who is equally strong and capable, compared to a sister who is always second to him and dependent on him for her protection.

Unfortunately even today, many Indian parents are convinced that every penny given to a daughter is taken from her brother’s rightful share, hence you have parents helping even a needy daughter without letting the son know. And the son’s outrageous indignation is difficult to understand until you realise how he has grown up hearing that everything they have his rightfully his.
Legally all the children have equal right to their parents’ property, but the parents can disinherit a child from the property they have earned himself. Property that has been inherited from grandparents belongs equally to all the grandchildren, including a daughter’s children.

At the same time, according to the law, parents are entitled to receiving care from all the children, sons and daughters. A son in law who does not allow his wife to care for her parents, (while he considers it her duty to care for his parents) is obviously wrong, because she is legally bound to care for them, just like it is his duty to take care of his own parents.

How are caring and inheritance related? Unfortunately money does matter more than it is supposed to, so it is better for old parents, to have - if nothing else at least the power of financial independence and legal protection.

Some Speeches Are A result of Provocation?

I thought this speech (video)was not worth wasting a blog post on. There was enough news and noise. Action was being taken.
In 1999, India's autonomous Election Commission has banned an ultra nationalist Hindu leader from contesting elections for two years. And now Indian Express said, 'Divided EC united in strong reply to Varun’s hate speech.'

"The BJP disapproves and dissociates itself from the statements attributed to Mr Varun Gandhi," (Ravi Shankar Prasad, BJP spokesperson)

Varun first says the tapes are doctored; then admits to parts of the speech being his own. He doesn’t deny that it was he who said that he would cut the hand that dares lay a finger on Hindus, adding that he is a “Gandhi, a Hindu and an Indian.”

But then we know how such speeches have been made routinely in this country in recent times, Varun Gandhi is not the first person accused of making such speeches. (Watch this CNN IBN video called Rogues Gallery to watch some of the others do the same thing.)

There will always be some who will claim that such speeches (and perhaps the tension that might follow?) might be a result of provocation by other equal citizens.... (Just like North Indians provoked being labeled outsiders in their own country and girls in Mangalore provoked Sri Ram Sene to assault them.) They will tell us that the voters in Pilibhit are suffering. (Details of their suffering with or without any links available elsewhere in the blogosphere.) But what do the people of Pilibhit have to say?

In this video, one man says he was disappointed with Varun Gandhi's speech, another reassures that there is no communal tension in Pilibhit, he says they just celebrated recent festivals in absolute harmony, he also explained that when a leader says so many things, sometimes he might also say something wrong. He does not say what Varun Gandhi said was right, so the assumption that 77% of 'real-Indians' are different from city dwelling educated middle class fake-Indians is not accurate.

It did not look like they wanted any hands chopped off by their representatives.

Watch it for yourself :)



And then you start reading the comments below some of the related news article and the videos and realise that no matter how peaceful their lives are today, if this is not nipped in the bud, we will hear news of communal tension in Pilibhit also.

We featured in Deccan Herald :)

Imp's Mom sent me an email this morning, Hi IHM,

u;ve been talked about in today's DH Living, Virtual Catharsis for women :)

http://deccanheraldepaper.com//svww_showarticle.php?art=20090321l_004100004

Congrats!! had to log in and let u know :)

Thank You Imp's Mom!

And below are some excerpts from the article :)

Deccan Herald
Virtual catharsis for women

Several homemakers as well as working professionals are creating online diaries that are sometimes an extension of their lives, sometimes a tell-it-all and sometimes fantasy-filled journeys, says Kalindi Sheth

An year ago, a 43-year-old homemaker from Mumbai started writing about her everyday life, and whatever touched it. Nothing extraordinary about it, except that her 'diary' was online.

She called herself Indian Home Maker (IHM), and her blog, The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker, because it aimed to be about "the life of any middle-class Indian homemaker. I know that my friends, who are also homemakers, go through similar experiences." Her blog, IHM was not just an outlet for her thoughts but was also her support system.

A subliminal trend has taken root in urban middle-class India as the Internet becomes both affordable and popular. Several women, homemakers and working professionals, the young and not-so-young, are creating online diaries that sometimes are an extension of their lives, and at other times, fantasy-filled journeys of what they yearn to be.

Political and personal

Often, though, like in the case of IHM, blogs start out as simple updates on their lives, and mutate into a discussion portal for issues that span the political and personal.

Monica Mody (...let me go find her in the blogosphere!) says, 'It has allowed many adolescents, women, people with crazy/interesting hobbies, old women, right-wing and left-wing fundamentalists, and so on, to record their thoughts/observations and articulate them and find sympathisers ... Which means that blogging can be a progressive or regressive force depending on who is blogging.'

While blogging has helped several women find an outlet for their thoughts, and sometimes, garner support in troubled times, it is merely a tool.

Other bloggers featured from my blogroll are, 'MadMomma, a blogger from Delhi and a mother of two, who started her blog in 2006 out of boredom.' and Aanchal Tyagi, a filmmaker based in Delhi, started a blog titled 'Three Drinks Ahead'.

Made my day :)

Being Politically Correct.

A commenter thinks I must be unbiased and criticize other religions too. He says not criticizing religions other than your own is trying to be politically correct.

Where it is relevant I do that, but to criticise for balancing ...what purpose would that serve?

When I criticise Hindusim or our society for it's obsession with sons, for dowry for it's gender or caste biases it is always in the hope that the criticism will make a difference. Also it concerns me directly and I know what I am talking about.

If the idea of criticising is to settle scores, then there is a risk of it becoming an unnecessary and endless battle... and that is if there were any scores to settle. I have (fortunately) none.

But if the idea is to help by criticising, who will this criticism help?

Just after we have told a certain community to go back to their 'pure' nation, after we have not condemned their being burnt alive or made homeless, if we still went ahead and discussed threadbare the follies of their faith (maybe all very true) it becomes difficult for them to see our (leaders') sudden concern for their welfare by making them accept the Uniform Civil Code. So I will not comment.

But I have no reason not to fight against unequal Property Rights in the Hindu law. That is something that directly concerns me. The idea is not to find faults with any religion but to make our lives better, isn't that why religion was created?

Can't say the same for another religion. After we have justified, excused, forgotten to condemn or protest aganist the killing of a people or attacks on their places of worship (whatever our grouses), when we try and tell them we are concerned about the flaws in their faith, I can't imagine them welcoming that criticism.

Unfortunately most people who suggest such balancing of criticism are those who did not condemn the much bigger injustice of violence against them.

And then why should my criticising another religion make someone feel vindicated?

First, is there much difference? Every religion is being used for political power. No religion is fair to women. The middleman in every religion wants power.

Then why divide ourselves on the basis of 'my faith is a little less discriminatory than yours'??? Always ignoring the fact that somebody is very happy to see us quarrel like this.

A commenter thought I would condemn Lajja by Taslima Nasreen because according to him I am psuedo-secular (?).
But Lajja is a must-read, and an eye opener. She talks of putting the nation and human values above religious identities. When we see the book from an Indian point of view, we need to keep in mind that the minorities here are not the Hindus. She talks about religious discrimination. She also speaks of the ridiculousness of telling our countrymen they belong to another country, because they follow a faith the majority in that 'other' nation follows.

But of course we are free to read it all wrong and feel like self righteous victims and then we can decide to settle scores by asking some fellow citizens in our country to leave the country. We know this happens. Do read this comment here on Nimmy's blog, please do read the replies too.

We are very emotional about imagined victimisation. We forget who has benefited from being liberal, tolerant, generous and democratic. We can only accept us as generous and liberal if some other equal citizens are grateful to us for our 'tolerance'... we forget we are not doing anybody a favour by being tolerant. It's everybody's right to live, and to live as equals. So threats like "If they want to live here they better follow our 'way of life' ..." are no different from molesters in Mangalore demanding women live the way Sri Ram Sene deems correct.

Identifying ourselves by our religion is labeling ourselves. All Hindus are same? Can all Hindus identify with the attackers in Mangalore?

Some people say religion causes divides. But it isn't religion that causes divides, it is intolerance. If we are intolerant we will find many other reasons for creating divides. The last year saw us dividing over language, region, religion, and gender, class and culture. Pakistan is an example of what intolerance and fundamentalism can do.
Fanaticism has no religion. If it can happen to them, it can happen to us.

But we still have time.

Edited to add: Received this link worth watching, via email. (There's an ad before the video begins.. please be patient).

Are you an Extrovert or an Introvert?

I could never decide!
I think some of us are extrovert sometimes, introverts at other times. This tests is good, because it's more balanced.
I am 53%Introvert, and 47% Extrovert :)
I took this Personality Types Test, and the results seem kind of accurate ... do you agree?
The Dreamer bit bothered me at first, but then you have to dream, only then can you work to make those dreams come true ...

INFP - The Dreamer"

Jungian Personality Types (Free Test)

INFPs are introspective, private, creative and highly idealistic individuals that have a constant desire to be on a meaningful path. They are driven by their values and seek peace. Empathetic and compassionate, they want to help others and humanity as a whole. INFPs are imaginative, artistic and often have a talent for language and writing. They can also be described as easygoing, selfless, guarded, adaptable, patient and loyal.

Please do take this test, and do leave a comment or write a post about your results :) It will be great to get to know a little more about my blogging friends.

I saw this test on Mystic Margarita's Blog she is INFP and I was amazed to see the description of INFP because I thought it fitted me... the test result showed I was also INFP and also that even the proportion of feeling, perceiving, intuitive and introverted were not very different from Mystic Margarita's!

Does Pink Clash with Saffron?

How does one choose any one favorite colour?

Beige curtains are fine but not beige sarees.
A pink lipstick is welcome but not pink planters.
And black is considered drab, but many of us love black for evening wear.

And then some colours have reputations.
Red is hot, white is cool, grey is drab, pink is soft.

Pink has become the colour of liberty and successful protests.

I think I like Fuchsia, a deep, bluish pink the best!
Fushcia is a pink, so it symbolises Liberty and Gender Equality.
It has blue so it defies gender colour coding.
And it looks great on flowers, clothes, lipsticks, cushions, curtains, luggage ...
(Though my cat doesn't like it ;D)

Edited to Add: I have been receiving some useful and interesting links -generally informative News articles, these come from my own email address, but I have not sent them to myself...
I wonder if somebody else is also receiving such links from themselves!?
The most recent one is this, 'Banished, Ram Sena chief slams BJP'.

I conduct mini exit polls :)

We pass by an election poster and I asked.

IHM: "So do you think Sanjay Dutt will win from your home town?"

Driver #2 : "He will win."

IHM: "Yeah I read somewhere, he has no rivals ...others have criminal cases against them ... or are not popular."

Driver #1: "Let there be anybody against him."

IHM: "Is he that popular?"

Driver #2 : "He said he would not have fought against Vajpayee-jee."
(In a tone that implied nothing could be more honorable.)

IHM: Oh Vajpayee jee? But why is Vajpayee jee so popular?

Offended silence.

IHM: Err... I mean of course he made great speeches, of course he is highly respected, no criminal cases against him either... So you think Sanjay Dutt would really have never won against him?

Driver #2 : Sanjay Dutt would not have fought against him.

IHM: But I had no idea BJP was popular there...

Driver #1 and Driver #2 : BJP no, not BJP! Our vote is always for Sa Pa. (SP)

IHM: And Amar Singh? What do you think of Amar Singh? Do you like him?

Driver #1 : We vote for Mulayam jee.
(I take it that this means they would not have voted if Amar singh was the candidate ...)

IHM: And how is BSP?

Driver #1: Mayawati has made her statues everywhere. (More details explaining why they don't like her ...) But she has all the votes of X and Y castes and now even Z community.

IHM: Why vote for caste or religion!? Vote for whoever does something for road and electricity.. look at the condition of these NCR roads! Isn't it wrong to practice untouchability ?

Silence.

IHM: Is it still practiced?

Driver#1: When X & Y castes visit, they are given chairs to sit.

IHM: So you respect both ... I thought both couldn't be put in the same bracket!

Silence.

IHM: Doesn't that show respect????

Driver #1: Only chairs are offered. No charpoys.

I have no idea what this means... ! But they thought I understood and I didn't want to show my ignorance, and anyway they were clear Sanjay Dutt will win and if he is stopped from fighting elections, than his wife Manyata will win. In Sanjay Dutt's case the votes will not be for caste.
I realised I could not discuss Manyata's comments on wifely duties here...

Now let's see how right these guys are proved eventually!

EDITED TO ADD: X and Y castes are Dalits and Brahmans.

Of Guns and Weddings...

The only thing that makes staying away from the Blogosphere bearable are the messages from blogging friends that you were missed. Thank You for each one of those messages and comments :)

The past few days were loaded with blog worthy moments! Right from the time I got out of the Airport, ...or even before that, right from the moment an Uncle called to invite us for a cousin's wedding.

The first thought was to explain how impossible it was to attend. Then he mentioned how they feared my dad would not have approved of their son getting married to a non Hindu, non-Indian girl. How they had no choice because the boy will not marry any other girl...

If I wasn't blogging I would have just thought, "What a crazy family we are!" But now I notice how many Indias we have in our family.

Uncle seemed to think that his adult son owed an explanation to a cousin he's only met at various weddings and other such functions.

Although he is Dad's sister's son, to me cousin V was just another over-enthusiastic young cousin dancing for the video-walla at my wedding. I assure his dad I will not miss this wedding for anything and I was sure cousin V was old enough to take this decision. (Resisted the urge to add that all this was none of my business anyway...)

Uncle: That's what he says, his bank leaves decisions worth millions to him, but he feels we don't trust him to take any decisions...

IHM: I guess the times are changing and we must stand by our kids.

Uncle : Your aunt thinks this would have never happened if your dad was alive.

IHM: Dad would have only wanted to see all the kids in the family happy.

Lots more along the same lines, and I am proud of this Uncle for being wiser than many other parents in the family. I know of another cousin who wasn't happy with the marriage that was arranged for him... and who told me? His wife, a gynecologist :(

I am also mildly horrified by the image- totally untrue - dad has. His sister claims this calamity would never have befallen them if my Dad was alive!

She said something about dad taking out his gun.

...and me aware that a nephew had tattooed his non Hindu girl friend's very Christian name on his chest :)

And Dad had laughed indulgently when he heard of it.

Technology Encourages Long-Distance Tuneless Singing.

I don't think technology necessarily creates distance. It's more like we can use or abuse anything. Don't you agree?

A friend from Andhra is getting bored in a hospital waiting room in Delhi. She wants to remember a song she has a tune in her mind of, so she walks outside the waiting room and hums this lovely tune into her cell phone ....






Then there's my sister always hungry for some Radio One style latest Indi pop and Bollywood music ... she wants to remember some old forgotten song all the time, she claims she sings well, I disagree ;)
She loves this one ...




Old school friend from class XI, is always available on Windows Live, in Tainga or in Delhi. I 'nudge' her to ask if she remembered a daily morning hymn we sang every morning in school. She wanted to hear the tune ... so I sang out of tune,

'Father we thank thee for the night,
And for the .. morning light,
help us to do the things we should,
to be to others kind and good'.

LOL No wonder she couldn't remember it!

Gym friend had declared I could never have cancer with her special logic of "...because I am telling you."

Without the least encouragement from me a bet was made and if I lose (i.e. survive ) I had to treat her to lunch. So one Tuesday we drove all over the city - gallivanted, lunched , sang tunelessly and I managed to get a sore throat.

Yesterday morning I received an SMS saying,
'As we bid adieu to the Army, we wish to express our heart felt gratitude .... for being such a part of our lives ... '

This friend from Maharashtra and her half-Punjabi husband have completed twenty years in the Army. She is one of those who stopped remembering our age [only mental age] the day we turned 21 :) Since I was getting ridiculously senti at this new beginning of their life we sang Auld Lang Syne (Tunelessly - neither can sing.)



(The Reggae version of Auld Lang Syne here)

What's some tuneless singing between friends :)

Note: I may not be able to access the blogosphere for the next three days ...

Tattoo Tales :)

My mom is horrified, "You let her go where?"

IHM: "Err it's okay, she will be fine ..."

My Mom: She didn't listen to you? Give me her mobile number. Let me speak to her ...

IHM: "Ma, I have seen the place, and I liked the design she chose ..."

My Mom: 'Tattoo is same thing that our bai has on her arm? Oh! It must be one of those stick-on things?"

IHM: "Err no actually it is the permanent kinds. But don't worry, she is a sensible girl ... I have considered all these things. And so has she. It's her arm ma ;)"

My Mom: "You allowed her to get a permanent tattoo! "

IHM: "Maa I had bigger concerns, the place is hygienic, and they use disposable needles ..."

My Mom: "You give the phone to your your Lord and Master!"

IHM: He isn't home :)

My Mom: Son is home?

IHM: Son?? Yeah ...

So I give the phone to Son, who had been busy with his home work.

This is what I hear (He isn't too comfortable with Hindi.)

"Yeah but Nani times have changed, zamana abhi badal gaya hai nani !"

"Nani but she is .. err woh aaj ke zamane ki ladki hai! "

"But it's her hand nani, she likes it, and all our friends also have tattoos ..."

" ....no she can't jump in a well if they do but err ... it's a very common thing these days, now times have changed a lot ... "

"Me? No? I have not thought about getting one for myself Nani... err Thank You Nani :D"

"...but actually it is not considered a bad thing these days, your time was very different ... now we have modern technology."

"Yes Nani you are also modern."

"Okay Nani. Er but nani, .. err but if your daughter wanted a tattoo what would you have said?"

"Oh!..... Yes Nani."

" But actually Mamma is also planning to get one."

"Nani wants to speak to you."

The phone is handed back to me.

Remembering Bra Burning Bogeymen on Women's Day

Since the Indian woman did not need to fight for her right to vote (suffrage), she has taken her right to vote and legal equality for granted. We are lucky. .... Now that we need to fight, here are some inspiring glimpses of women’s history, history of this struggle for basic rights.

Shouldn’t we study it in more detail in school, as a part of History?

A HUNDRED YEARS AGO.

Many (most) of us are not aware of the struggle that women in the West went through to achieve voting rights for women (female suffrage). What you read below might seem ludicrous today but nearly a hundred years ago a lot of people (including women) all over the world thought it was the demands that were ludicrous.

Women worked and paid taxes but were denied the right to vote. Many of them said, "I prefer love to my rights.", "Oh it's a fad - nothing more.", and many feared that asking for suffrage made them lose their feminine charms ...

***

1875

The Logic of the Law

In 1875 the Supreme court of Wisconsin in denying the petition of women to practice before it said:

"It would be shocking to a man's reverence for womanhood and faith in woman.... that woman should be permitted to mix professionally in all the nastiness which finds its way into courts of justice."

It then named thirteen subjects as unfit for attention of women, three of them crimes against women.

***

"Look at the hazards, the risks, the physical dangers that ladies would be exposed to at the polls."
Anti-suffrage speech. (Suffrage- Right to Vote)

***

February 21, 1915, Sunday

Section: Votes for Women Real Estate Automobiles, Page XX1, 433 words

In the editorial "The Woman Suffrage Crisis" in your issue of Feb. 7 this statement appeared: "The grant of suffrage to women is repugnant to instincts that strike their roots deep in the order of nature."

Is this an argument against female suffrage?

Do you think that manhood suffrage was granted because it was in accord with natural laws?

***

ARE WOMEN PEOPLE?

(DO GO THROUGH THIS LINK WHENEVER YOU HAVE THE TIME)

1915

Women love self-sacrifice

Suffering and good advice;

If they don t love these sincerely

Then they re not true women really.

Oh, it shocks me so to note

Women pleading for the vote I

Saying publicly it would

Educate and do them good.

Such a selfish reason trips

Oddly from a woman s lips.

But it must not be supposed

I am in the least opposed.

If they want it let them try it.

For I think we'll profit by it.

***

Lastly,

Bra Burning Feminist. A Bogeyman to scare women and men away?

"The stereotype of the “bra-burning feminist” is one that remains today as a sort of feminist bogeyman to scare women (and men) away from the movement by pointing out how “ridiculous” and “radical” feminists are. The rub is, feminists never burned their bras as a political statement.

It’s important to remember that, even though the particular claim is a myth, the act that it symbolized — a rejection of patriarchal beauty standards and the trappings that go with them — is absolutely a feminist cause and not trivial at all."

***
Well behaved women rarely make history, Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

***

We are fortunate enough to have inspiration in women who did struggle and succeed. Let's not give up without putting up a good fight, like Surbhi says, 'The new and improved 'desi girl' has decided she isn't going to wait for help - she will help herself... enna rascala mind it!'

Edited to add: Read about the struggle in Karachi here. (Rakesh thanks for the link!)

Have A Safe Women's Day

Monika wrote a post about being fearless, and Apu wrote of how unsafe women are feeling these days. Then I received this as an email forward, it is actually possible to fight back like this!
Take a look.









I saw this at Monika's, who saw this at D's, and if you want your own hero you can go directly to the Hero Factory by clicking here!



PS I have added some Pink bubbles and Women's Day Wishes to the original picture.

A Dog's Vocabulary

Do you want a biscuit?
A cake?
Water? You want to go down?
Bath?
Get down!
Take!
Come. Go. Sit. Run! Catch! Jump!
You want to go out and eat grass?
Go sleep in your own bed!
Good boy.
Bad boy!
No we don't run after cats!
Walk?
Papa. Mamma. All familar dogs, cats, and human names.
Where's your leash?
Find your bone!
Where's your ball?
Gabbar Singh find Sher Khan..where's Sher Khan?
Find!
Go out in the balcony.
Medicine. Vet.
Water. Food. Pedigree. Biscuit. Royal Canine.
You want milk?
Where's your bowl?
Do your job!
Where's your collar?
WAIT!
It's hot!
You want the AC on?
Any sound of the biscuit tin opening. A chocolate wrapper anywhere.
Go sit in window!
Look Devil's outside! (The neighbour's dog)
Stop barking!
Now sleep.
Where's your quilt?
Who tore this newspaper?
Go get the newspaper!
Shake hands:)
Pillow. Table. Kitchen.
Fetch. Bark. Quiet!
"Aww you missed me!"

She is an old friend. The baby is a Dalmation, a fast growing, unwanted, unwelcome pup.
She says she is not fond of dogs, but is beginning to like hers just a little.

Guess what's she trying to say?

She calls to say, "We are giving him up for adoption."

Next week.
"I say such stuff when I am upset, I can never even consider that, he can't even sleep without some part of him touching me."

"He cried all night, only stopped crying when I sat with him in my lap."
(I warned, "Don't do something you can't continue doing, this can become a habit!" She didn't listen.)

"IHM I really was against it. I knew I didn't have the patience required ...!"(crib, crib, blah, blah)

She calls again,
"IHM he has so much energy, I am so tired, I take him to play in the park, I do everything so he will get tired and sleep for sometime ..."

And then again,
"...but today my mom in law saw how he placed his hands on the kitchen sink to peep inside ... he is only fascinated by the noise of running water - but she thinks it's unhygienic. ...but he looks so cute when he stands like this, he is just a baby you know, she doesn't understand ..."

"You won't believe how he hates the visits to the doctor, he hides his face in my shoulder, why can't we have painless injections?"

"IHM I end up doing everything for him. Nobody helps me."

"He is smart you know, his vocabulary is amazing ..!"

"We were out all day, couldn't take him, and he was so upset, he missed us, specially me and he clung to me all night... "

"My husband is the reason why he is so spoiled! He is so inconsistent. One day he is angry for the same thing, next day it becomes so cute ... And then he says I am the one who spoils him!"

"I am not the emo-types ."

"If I have another one, I know he will be very well brought up. I have learnt so much while raising this one!" This was yesterday :)

What do you think of her?
Guess ...??

The First Born Tag ...

Mamma Mia tagged me to do this one.

1. WAS YOUR FIRST PREGNANCY PLANNED?

Yes.

2. WERE YOU MARRIED AT THE TIME?

Yes. (No interesting answers here!)

3. WHAT WERE YOUR REACTIONS?

"How can someone NOT eat when pregnant? Dr Are you sure this nausea isn't jaundice?"
And then a kind friend told us where to get GORDON BOURNE's 'Pregnancy'. That changed the whole attitude :)

4. WAS ABORTION AN OPTION FOR YOU?

No.

5. HOW OLD WERE YOU?

Read all about it here :)

6. HOW DID YOU FIND OUT YOU WERE PREGNANT?
The doctor said it was pregnancy. (And no jaundice)

7. WHO DID YOU TELL FIRST?

Had gone to the hospital with Husband. By then everybody had guessed from endless Bollywood style (but much worse) retching.

8. DUE DATE?

Wasn't sure she would be a Capricorn or an Aquarius!

9. DID YOU HAVE MORNING SICKNESS?

Enough to make me wish I wasn't pregnant. Hated the first trimester. Lost weight, threw up a lot.

10. WHAT DID YOU CRAVE?

Plums, Chole Bhature, rasam, Bhindi fried without jeera, chappaties without ghee, cucumber, ..Mom's cooking.

11. WHO/WHAT IRRITATED YOU THE MOST?
After the first trimester, almost nothing.
Not even being advised to drink pure ghee, not even people saying avoid this eclipse and that food, gain more weight or don't get wet in the rain, don't dance, don't wear jeans, don't sit on a bike ...
I had my bible in Gordon Bourne's pregnancy :)

12. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CHILD'S SEX?
A girl.

13. DID YOU WISH YOU HAD THE OPPOSITE SEX OF WHAT YOU WERE GETTING?

No. We would have been happy with either, didn't matter.

14. HOW MANY POUNDS DID YOU GAIN THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY?

10 kgs.

15. DID YOU HAVE A BABY SHOWER?

No.

16. WAS IT A SURPRISE OR DID YOU KNOW?

No baby shower, and didn't miss it either.

17. DID YOU HAVE ANY COMPLICATIONS DURING YOUR PREGNANCY?

No, none after the initial morning(Morning?) sickness.

18. WHERE DID YOU GIVE BIRTH?

Bombay.

19. HOW MANY HOURS WERE YOU IN LABOR?

Four-Five hours.

20. WHO DROVE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL/BIRTH CENTER?

Strolled into the hospital, it was almost next door . She was born just a few hours after the due date, so it went as planned.

21. WHO WATCHED YOU GIVE BIRTH?

The gynae and her team...

22. WAS IT NATURAL OR C-SECTION?

Natural.

23. DID YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO EASE THE PAIN?

No. But was seriously considering it.

24. HOW MUCH DID YOUR CHILD WEIGH?
2.9 kgs.

25. WHEN WAS YOUR CHILD ACTUALLY BORN ?

At 6 42 am :)
The doc told me to look up and see the time, because she realised the baby will be born with one more push. I was tired, so she said "Feel the head, it's almost out!", and I felt her head, as soft as my elbow. Next minute she was crying like a typical Bollywood new born!

26. WHAT WAS YOUR REACTION WHEN THE DOCTOR ANNOUNCED THE SEX OF THE BABY?

I asked to hold her. She twitched her mouth and I saw a dimple, and then I think it was the relief and disbelief that it was all over without the world coming to an end, I laughed aloud and thanked everybody (almost silly it seems now, but I have read many mothers do this).

27. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST REACTION ON SEEING THE BABY?
Overwhelmed, very emotional, relieved it's over, and awed .. totally in awe ...

28. DID YOU CRY?

No laughed aloud.

29. WHAT DID YOU NAME HIM/HER?
Brat!

30. HOW OLD IS YOUR FIRST BORN TODAY

She is a teenager. Her shoe size is bigger than mine :)

Like Abha who tagged me, my pregnancy was one of the funnest times of my life.
Did all kind of things to have a happy baby. Read good books, listened to good music, took pictures, exercised, picnicked in the hills. Add to that the hormones make your skin and hair look so much nicer. Everybody had predicted it was going to be a girl :)
I had expected someone like me, she turned out to be like my sister :(

I would like to tag Imp's Mom, Indyana, cantaloupes.amma, Phoenixritu, Varunavi, Ugich Konitari, Ritu, Priyanka, Sandhya, Mampi, How do we know, Pr3rna, Bones, Nimmy, Monika, 2B's Mommy, Goofy Mamma, Solilo, Shail, UshaPisharody and MySpace, Tearsndreams, Just call me A and Dipali. And the newset blogging mom I know, Aneela :)
Anybody else who would like to do this tag, simply must do it ... do let me know when the tag is done, it will be a pleasure to read it. Also wondering, did you laugh out loud like I did?

Practical Paro Artless Chandramukhi

Dev D is overwhelming, every time I think of writing about it, there are so many thoughts rushing in I end up writing about something entirely different...

Number one I had no idea we had started making movies like this.
Number two the director is a man.
Number three he has been smart enough to make such a movie and still keep it out of all controversy. I almost thought it was a B grade movie when Chammak Challo is asked to send a photograph of hers to Cool Dude during an online chat. She could have met the same fate as the Delhi school girl in the MMS case...
I had always wondered what that Delhi student's family might be going through, the police had gone to meet her. The parents said she had been sent abroad (Ah the magical place, thank God for Abroad!) ...why can't India be a bit of abroad for it's female citizens? All that moralising in those days, gave me the creeps . She was just a kid and obviously not a very smart kid. Not like the street smart (but equally lovable) Paro. She was not really a criminal, just a foolish, naive, stupid girl. She needed to be told to mind what she got herself filmed doing, and by who. It should have been left at that.

In the movie she is half Indian and I have seen how confusing our culture can be for all half western, half Indian girls. I see one such naive fool with this boy in dark corners near my place. I sometimes think I should tell her mother to watch out for Indian double standards. Does this foreigner know what hypocrites we Indians are? Sometimes my neighbours discuss how this is offensive. I really can't see how it offends them though I have tried. So I tactfully suggest we leave these kids' morals to their parents.

We Indians are not naive like this American girl, ...Paro epitomizes some of us and I admire her for her practicality!

Paro is smart. This girl has confidence, she is proud of passing with good grades every year, better than Dev D, who barely scrapes though :) Our justified faith in education as a saviour, and our Indian obsession with good grades. I know many class toppers being equally bright in every field, including -like Paro, in their ability to break some social standards of perfect female behaviour. But their biggest ability lies in still surviving it all, to live a normal middle class life. That's the best part. We see it happening everywhere. So unlike the child like trust and innocence of the Western girls who get caught on camera and ruin their lives. Why can't they understand our Indian values and culture? What's so complicated in this simple rule? And it couldn't get simpler than this: Just don't get caught.

That's our culture in four simple words. Just don't get caught.

Of Love, Lust and Respect

Miss B - “The stronger sex is actually the weaker sex because of it’s weakness for the weaker sex.”

Once we walked into a couple discussing or rather fighting over some interesting theories that the man had.

1. Whether it was possible for a man to love and respect the same woman. This man felt love (he meant lust I guess) and respect did not go together.

2. He insisted respect was higher than love, and a man must marry a woman only if he respects her, and he claimed he respected his wife. (And hence if he flirted with or was attracted to other women, she should not get hyper, you see, he could never respect them.)

3. He said women should be pure and worthy of worship. And they should have a clean image. Men had the luxury of being bad, wicked, sinful and hence also of being forgiven. (Very smart I thought.)

4. He explained that men were weak, and they can not 'resist' the temptation of bad women, although they can never respect these 'bad' women.
(And we all know how respectable that makes such men! )

I still fume when I remember.
I wanted to ask if he wondered whether his wife respected him or loved him? I doubt if it mattered to him. He could afford to not care for her respect or love. And frankly I don't think he cared even a bit for her.

Dev D, the character, reminded me of that guy. And hats off to any director for discussing this and many other things that still confuse some Indian men!


(I have lots more to say about Dev D - in the next post. )

The Art of Not Being Provocative

This post is in response to this post by Nimmy , which was in response to this post. This is just an attempt to answer some of Ms B's questions, please feel free to add your own views ...

Miss A : Hey hey,read what IHM has written about so called provocative dressing

Miss B: Yeah,I read it, she is talking about an idealistic society, where everybody is mature and is aware of one own responsibility. Idealism is good,but reality and practicality is different.

IHM: The post is about many different kind of people living in the same society. There will be modern and conservative families. There will also be criminals and anti social elements in a society.

We need to make sure all crimes are punished to set good examples. No excuses for any crimes, including those against women.

If the hormonal/testosterone problem is very severe I once read the French government suggested some simple hormonal treatment to cure such anti social men, who are just not able to control themselves from raping/molesting. (being sarcastic)

Sex crimes are a result of Provocation or Opportunism?

Considering how such men only get provoked when they are in cowardly gangs, on lonely roads, when women is are from poorer classes, when there is little chance of being punished etc, it sounds like it has nothing to do with seeing a good looking woman and suddenly being provoked into molesting.

Miss B: Any woman should be able to wear what she wants anywhere, and for that matter, so should men, but if we go by that ideology, then nudism should be perfectly acceptable in all spheres of society too. We should all be able to keep our doors unlocked when we leave home and also to keep our valuables on the table unattended while we nip to the toilet in a busy cafe too. However, human nature is unpredictable and thus we must always be on our guard. “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance”

IHM: Be on your guard by all means.

Learn karate. Keep a cell phone, keep pepper spray, take a friend along - but don't fall into this trap of believing that being dressed 'modestly' will protect you.

And do get out, do dress up, if everybody locked themselves in their houses, the streets will only become more unsafe, and then if you are forced due to some emergency ....

About Nudism? I don't know if this is relevant here but acceptable or not, even nudism is no excuse for a man to get provoked into raping a woman.

According to the law, even a prostitute cannot be raped.

Miss B: You messed it, In fact men like to look at such women who reveal their assets, who make private things public.

IHM: They are free to look. Only look. Appreciate? Sure.

Pass remarks? Touch? Molest? No. We live in a civilised society. They need to be taught that in a civilised society they may not touch anything that looks good to them. And they may not dare to touch another human passing by on the road without their permission.

Miss B: Ha ha,if that was they case,why don’t they wear such revealing dress inside their house and in front of family alone ? When she wears it to public,the message is simple-that she feels good being looked at,maybe by men or maybe by women. Isn’t this ‘feel good’ thing called attention seeker?

IHM: I assure you thousands of women in the more civilised societies, India’s bigger cities, developed world, in villages, in slums do not get molested for looking attractive, but because they are not in a position to get the culprit punished.

Maybe women feel good when men and women look at them. Maybe they just look good for themselves. That’s their problem. Molesting a woman is still not permissible.

Miss B: So tell me why do you dress in a way that will attract comments.?

IHM: Because In have no idea what will NOT attract comments except teaching the commenter a lesson. Do you think a sari or a burka will stop comments? Read this, in a country where women are forever being stoned/lashed for getting raped , where they are covered from head to toe, they still get comments and they can’t even dare to complain, they have car accidents because .. read this to know what blaming the victim can do. Is this normal life?

This can happen to us.

This also shows why we need women in positions of decision making.

Miss B: Agreed, but why do you get offended at somebody else’s comment if you feel you are right?

IHM: We get offended because we know we are right. And we know there are a few who, against all logic, will try to tell us that no matter how we are dressed or how we live or what our age, the commenter was provoked and we are to be blamed.

Miss B: Tell me why you women want to portray yourself as sexual objects while you go on 40 km essays on asking men to stop viewing women as sexual objects? When you yourself feel and is proud of being a sexual object, why do you complain about others looking at you through such glasses..?

IHM: Women do not want to be sexual objects.

Their bare arms, their legs, their eyes, faces, elbows, feet, hair let loose have not been created for men.

Every part of her body has a purpose. The legs are meant to take her places, to run, jump, to help her swim (in practical swimming costumes too), the nose needs to breath fresh air, the eyes need to see the open sky and trees and the world. Just like men’s eyes, nose, legs and arms.

When we ask her to cover her body to avoid provoking men into crimes, then we make her a sexual object.

She should be wearing whatever makes her comfortable, not perspiring in layers to feel (unrealistically) safe. Nothing is as unsafe as these layers of covering and hypocrisy.

These layers that cover her also keep her silent. We know of women who are victims of incest, abuse and torture but never dare to speak, because they know they will be made to feel like it's their fault. All this starts from 'you did not dress/talk/walk/smile etc right'.

Women must have an equal voice in the society, in law making, in education, in science labs, in war strategies, in the parliament everywhere. Such thinking might discourage them from stepping out, it does put women at a huge disadvantage.

Miss B: Tell me something,when women know that there are some sick devilish men out there in the society,should she opt to take care herself by dressing modestly,or should she go around enrolling all eve teasers to mental asylum..Tell me which of the two choices is practical?

IHM: What exactly is dressing ‘modestly’? Do the perverts get to make this decision and then guarantee women freedom from sexual crimes? Why do all civil societies (I don’t consider Taliban and Saudi Arabia civil societies) and women object to this?

Are crimes against women really related to the way we dress? Are women traditional Indian clothing safe from sexual assaults? If they are not then is it possible that we are imprisoning and controlling women in the name of protection?

Clothing is symbolic. When we tell women to dress to prevent provocation-related crimes aren’t we indirectly but very clearly telling the men that women and not they are responsible for such crimes?

Miss B: Yes,I am aware of the double faceted hypocrisy. I agree that society should provide a safe environment for all its citizens and not punish women for the few criminal men who can nor control their urges. But then again, how can government take care of each and every single citizen in the country?We have our share of responsibility..The bottom line is that in public some modesty is required to avoid problems.

IHM: The fact is that safer cities for everyone else are automatically safer for women too. This shows that if the law of the land is upheld, women (and hence families) are also safer.

A lot of harm is done when we justify such crimes. We need to unequivocally condemn any such acts and shift the shame from the victim to the culprit.

Punish a few, condemn all, and see the difference it makes. It will also give the girls and women and their families the confidence to give back to the guys, we will see bystanders also pitching in to thrash a molester.

Men who attack do that only because they know that there is a strong chance that they can get away with it. When we talk of provocative dressing we give them a very strong message that they will not be blamed. That's a very dangerous message to give in a civil society.

Miss B: I completely agree with you that women are not responsible for crimes committed on them and I agree with the ‘She did not ask for it’ theory.But in our real life.theories have less importance than practicals..I agree that as far as the dress code is concerned, the problem is the uneducated and ignorant observers not the dresser. Having said that, a person cannot but be mindful since there are just too many uneducated and ignorant people out there.So,it your choice whether you choose to be daring and outgo these vultures..But trust me,it is better to take care..“The stronger sex is actually the weaker sex because of it’s weakness for the weaker sex.”

IHM: If everybody had always lived in such fears women would still be wearing traditional clothing of their native places.

The fact is they don’t, that without really thinking about it, women realise that what they are allowed to wear is symbolic of how much freedom and equality they have. Along with economic independence, success, wealth comes the freedom to enjoy looking good and having fun.

So long as criminals of all kinds including sex crimes are punished to set good example for a good, civil society, we will find we are on our way to a better, more equal society.

Society gets used to anything, instead of getting them used to watching women being molested, let them get used to women walking freely, looking good, looking sexy and still not being assaulted.

I am being idealistic?

Here’s a self confessed pervert, read what keeps him well behaved (From Nimmy’s blog)

Dabir Dalton said

February 28, 2009 at 4:15 pm

Years ago during an eye exam the female dr. who sat directly in front of me during the exam was wearing a low cut blouse and the way she sat gave me a clear view inside her blouse…This made me very uncomfortable because I knew that if I said anything it would have been me who would have been charged with sexual harassment due to the double standards promoted by feminists like Miss A…Since then as much as possible I make certain to have my wife tag along whenever I have an appointment with an immodest female professional…]

Reply

Indian Homemaker said

March 1, 2009 at 7:39 am

Doesn’t this show that fear of punishment makes all kind of men behave best? In a world full of people of all kinds making everybody responsible for their own behaviour seems to be the most practical thing to do. -IHM

This simply sums up whatever I have been trying to say.

NOTE: Published it, but I am going to be trying to edit it to make it shorter, I realise it's too long.

Not Pink. He hates Pink.

What did you think this post was about? I know pink is generally associated with .... blushes but...

This post is about the handsomest cat in the world, he doesn't like Pink, he has been neutered so he has been called GAY, but I know he is MACHO, because I found he hates pink. He chose to sleep on a blue cushion.

Edited to add: Ms Renuka Chaudhary asked this! :)
Some of us might want to apply for Ms Nirmala Venkatsh's post, because she has been sacked.
I will be responding to Ms B soon.